5 Tips | Grief & The Holidays

The holiday season is here, which means family get-togethers, gift-giving, and happy times. For some this is the case, but for others, this can be a time filled with grief and sadness. Holidays are for spending time with those we love the most, so how can someone be expected to handle this time when a loved one has died? 

If you are missing a loved one this holiday season, here are some tips to help you take a step back from the grief and survive the holidays.

 

Tip One: Be prepared for grief triggers.

Let’s be honest, triggers are particularly evident during the holidays. Preparing for these triggers and having a plan to cope with them can make the triggers more manageable if you encounter them.

Tip Two: It’s okay to take a break from togetherness. 

Plan to get some space from the holiday chaos if you need it. Being surrounded by family and friends is great, but everything all at once can be emotionally overwhelming and hard to overcome. Don’t feel guilty about your grief. It is important to be conscious of your limits and take some time to collect yourself.

Tip Three: Seek gratitude. 

The holidays are a time to gather together, eat good food, and share what we’re thankful for. If you’ve recently lost a loved one, grief can make it difficult to feel thankful. Although you may be focusing on the loss, try and remember the good things that relationship brought into your life. Search for that gratitude. 

Tip Four: Decide which traditions you want to change or keep.

Acknowledge that things will be different this year. Some holiday traditions will remind you of your lost loved one, but it is okay to limit which of these you allow yourself to practice or not. Take time to determine which traditions will make you happy and which will overwhelm you. 

Tip Five: Say yes to help. 

Although you may typically play host during the holidays, this year may be too much to take on alone after losing your loved one. Accept help when it’s offered. Remember there is no shame in saying yes. Those who love you want to help. 

 

The holidays can be hard for those who have recently lost a loved one. Grief can be especially unavoidable during these times, but it is important to remember that you can still feel joy through the grief. Taking these tips into account can help you prepare for that grief and make your holidays more enjoyable despite your recent loss.

Dear Mom

I see you, but it isn’t you.  The same eyes, the same smile, the same face.

But you’re leaving me, one breath at a time, going to a peaceful place in your mind

where there’s no place for me.

The arms that used to hold me are quiet at your sides.  The legs that used

to take me for long walks are still.  Gone are the memories of my childhood.  You

recognize me, but you no longer KNOW me.

Week by week you turn further inward, and I can’t reach you there to bring

you back.  I can only keep watch, and laugh with you on a good day, and retreat to my

room and cry when confusion clouds your every thought.

I will love you, and care for you, and keep you safe until you leave, and

the memories I’ll have on this journey will give me peace until we’re together again

Your Loving Daughter

Volunteering with Hospice

Volunteers are an essential part of a hospice team, participating in roles from directly interacting with patients to helping with fundraising efforts. Hospice volunteers often describe their work as purposeful, validating, and meaningful. Hospice volunteers are at the heart of every hospice operation and are valued greatly.

How Hospice Volunteers Serve

Supporting Patients

This is a huge part of what hospice volunteers do. These tasks can include: visiting with patients, reading, taking walks, helping communicate for patients, bringing in therapeutic items, or supervising therapeutic visits. This list is not all-encompassing, and volunteers can do so much more for the patients they work with.

Comforting Family Members

Volunteers can do anything from listening to family members, sitting with them, or helping them with simple tasks like running errands or taking care of family pets. They are also able to help family members have some time alone by sitting with patients while family members take a nap or walk.

Fundraising and Administrative Work

Volunteers can also help hospice organizations by using their skills in the office with administrative duties. Fundraising efforts can include helping with mailings, contacting donors, facilitating events or writing thank-you letters.

Special Skills and Interests

In addition to everything listed above, each volunteer has their own set of skills or interests that could be of use to the hospice they are volunteering for. This could include skills such as: landscaping, musicians, barbers, notaries, sewing, etc. If you feel that your local hospice could benefit from a skill you enjoy, reach out!

 

If you or someone you know is interested in volunteering with Nurses in Touch, please reach out by contacting one of our offices near you today.